Since everybody else is talking about the Packers-Vikings game last night, I will not… (or did I just do what I said I wouldn’t do?)
I just read a post from another author/consultant whom I trust and has had a significant influence on our local church. These are the questions I am asking myself today. As a leader who has been called by God to influence others in His Church, which of these questions challenge you the most?
Emotional Intelligence (EQ) has a huge impact on our leadership, relationships and influence. Poor EQ causes us to lose coinage with others while good EQ does just the opposite. Think through the following indicators of good EQ and evaluate how well you are doing in these crucial areas.
I am approachable and have a nothing to prove, nothing to lose attitude
I seek to resolve conflict quickly and well
I am self defined but always leave the door open for dialogue with those who disagree and work to keep the relationship
I live with self confidence but not hubris
I am highly flexible
I seek to understand myself well including, weaknesses and strengths and the shadow side
I ask others for feedback on my behaviors
I am a team player and value “us” more than “me”
I work very hard to understand others and put myself in their place
I don’t hold grudges and extend forgiveness easily
I don’t need to be popular but I do desire to be respected
When conflict occurs I take responsibility for my part
There are no issues that are off limits for my team to discuss
I am patient with people and always give them the benefit of the doubt
I have a sense of humor about myself and don’t take myself too seriously
My biggest challenge on this list is "I am highly flexible". I like to think that I am "somewhat" flexible in working with a group to find the BEST solution, but once that solution is agreed upon I prefer to stick to the plan. I become defensive in this mindset by claiming that I am "avoiding being double-minded" or "sounding a clear trumpet call". When does being resolved/convinced become stubbornness or low EQ?
ReplyDeleteThat is a challenge for me as well and I don't have a magical answer but I definately can relate.
ReplyDeleteThere are many times in scripture that God has directed an individual and the vast majority around them did not agree or follow. At that time, the solution was given by God Himself and should not have been deviated from at all.
Having said that, there are also other times in scripture where it is very clear that God has led cooporately and has communicated His will to more than just one individual and by them coming together and sharing - they gained a fuller picture of what it was God wanted them to do.
I think sometimes - especially for task oriented type A personalities - it is a challenge for them to continue to be open to the direction of the Holy Spirit and His leadership. Sometimes they tend to put their nose to the grindstone and it is full steam ahead......but God has a right and often does provide course corrections along the way.
Ultimately He is our guide and we must follow His lead.
I am comforted when I read others experience the same issues that I do. " I seek to understand myself well including, weaknesses and strengths, and the shadow side." It also pays to be transparent so people can see we are far from perfect.
ReplyDeleteThe first generation disciples were plagued with legalism and other life and death situations brought on by the Pharisees and others. I think when we see challenges, we know we must be doing the right thing in God's eyes. Satan will use his divises to enhance our weaknesses and bring all manner of conflicts our way to keep us from fulfilling the great commision.
Praise God we have a heaven to gain and hell to shun. Our ultimate reward is waiting for us. We have to remember that just before Stephan was stoned, he looked up to heaven and saw our Lord standing along side the throne of the Heavenly Father, waiting for him, with His arms extended to receive him. If we are not challenged during our mission, are we in God's will?